Paper Dolls
by QuinnSalvatore
Summary: Rachel Berry's life is in shreds, but will her old high school sweet heart be able to stitch up the tears?


Rachel's eyes began to focus as the heavy curtain of sleep began to lift from her eyes. It hit her like a train, the fact that she had no idea where she was. The stench of mildew was thick in the air as the petite brunette yanked herself off from the harsh fabrics of the familiar bed, searching for her clothes – or any clothes- as she hesitantly pulled herself off the bed. Her throat felt on fire, everything seemed to itch and be sore and when she finally managed to get a glimpse of herself in the unhinged mirror that hung on the wall she wish she didn't. Her eyes sunk into her face deeply, her cheekbones pecking out just like her dad said they would if she didn't eat enough. Rachel always persisted that it was her quick metabolism and busy schedule, and they seemed to buy it. Or maybe they didn't, maybe they just didn't care anymore. Rachel didn't blame them after what she put them through. She only blamed herself these days.. She felt her heart begin to panic slightly as she caught sight of the clock, it was already 9am. Her train was in half an hour. She could only imagine how mad her old self would be, frustrated that she hadn't prepped herself in her usual pre-audition way. She always used to get enough sleep and drink warm water and lemon and now she felt she'd be lucky to even find enough change for the bus to the station. That is if she could find out where she was.

She heard a clash from the room next door and quickly pressed herself against the door, ready for a quick escape if it was necessary. She could feel her heart thump against her chest aggressively as she held her breath in anticipation of what was to come.

"Dammit Carter!" She yelped as a tall and lanky guy with a beard that needed shaving and a chest that needed covering slumped out of what looked to be the bathroom. As Rachel propelled herself into hitting him with whatever material that lay on the bed he quickly put his toothbrush to the side and in a way that almost seemed natural spat the contents of his mouth outside his apartment window. Rachel grimaced for a moment for the poor person that might have to have that land on their head, but it didn't last long – since sympathy wasn't something that she could feel right now. With only a towel wrapped around his lower half the guy managed to grab both of Rachel's hands in his to stop her slaps of protest.

"Could you stop that, Rach – seriously-" he pushed out in a slurred and nonchalant matter, it seemed that everything that Carter did was slurred and nonchalant. He never ironed his clothes, he didn't have a job, and his outlook on life was more than a little relax. Yet somehow Rachel listened to him and with a crinkled brow stared up at him.

"I'm sorry" she spat out indignantly "It's just – well you were meant to wake me up, okay? You promised you would" the anger had slipped out of her voice as she pushed past him into what she'd acknowledged to be the bathroom. Grabbing a hairbrush she yanked it through her hair, gasps of frustration being sighed out ever so often. "What the hell is this place?" she asked as she oddly found her own make up back and quickly removed the contents, continuing a regime of slapping it on in a rushed manner.

"Welcome to my new crib, or as I like to call it – Chez Carter" he exhaled as with a swift glide he flung himself onto the mattress that seemed to be the only real furniture in the room. "You really can't remember anything from last night?" he scoffed as he picked up a pair of red lace underwear that Rachel recognized to be her own. With another sound of anger she strutted back to him and grabbed the underwear out of his hands, not even sure where to put it. She felt her head spin as she looked at the clock again, she was running out of time.

"No, no I don't. Now where are my damn clothes Carter?" she interrogated again but only to find him bring himself closer to her and reach for her legs with his hands. She sighed as she let those familiar hands wander onto the touch of her skin and make their way up to her waste "Carter.." she murmered in protest.

"Oh come on, I'll help you remember..." his lips met that familiar spot on her thigh and Rachel shook her head in attempt to make her snap out of it. She pulled herself off him to his disappointment and finished up her make up in the mirror.

"Now seriously, my clothes, Carter?" she asked again, thankfully finding her handbag in the bathtub of all places. She heard a racket behind her and hoped it was the appearance of any item of clothing that belonged to her. None the less the dark haired fellow appeared by the door holding a crumpled mess of black. Rachel tilted her head to the side with her eyebrows furrowed, to which Carter shrugged ignorantly too. "Fine. I guess they'll have to do" she whispered in defeat, snatching them from him grasp and closing the door between them. After some struggling Rachel took one last look in the mirror and could feel the tears well up. The short black skirt seemed to cling to her ripped tights in a horrendous way, and that wasn't to say that the slinky top was much better. She'd never get the job looking like this, and if she didn't get that job, well she couldn't imagine what would happen if that happened. And she simply wouldn't.

Exiting the door with her bag, she slipped into her uncomfortably high red heels and took one last look around the room in search of a coat for the harsh September weather that lurked outside. She stumbled upon Carter's and decided it would just have to do. "What's the address?" she asked as she opened the askewer door, Carter looked bewildered and stared blankly back at her. "The address of this place, Carter, where are we?" she demanded again, feeling the strain in her voice already – she had no idea how she would sing. The tears threatened to push through again.

"I'll drive you" Carter offered with a mouthful of cheesepuffs.

"You will?" she asked with a slight edge of hope in her voice "Do you have gas?"

"No" he replied with another shrug, and Rachel quickly remembered why she never was a fan of hope. Without another word she shut the door behind her and whisked her way down the stairs that would definitely be categorized as a safety hazard. But that was what her whole life was, one big safety hazard. She didn't have a proper home, a proper job, any family or even friends anymore. All she had was stupid Carter, but whenever Rachel thought like that she reminded herself of the question – who would want stupid Rachel? And then Carter didn't look so bad. Just for a moment or so.

Rachel hailed down a taxi, but at least three of them continued by – and she knew it wasn't because they were booked. She consciously looked down at herself and gave her skirt another tug in attempt to bring it down at least an inch. Carter always made her wear those kind of clothing, and maybe a while ago she liked too as well. But now Rachel was just trying to pick up the pieces of her life, and she needed to collect them in something bigger than a bodycon. Finally the yellow car took a turn towards her, and as it did she desperately hoped she had enough money to pay. As she quickly mumbled the train station she sat back into the plush leather seat and tried to silently practice the song she was going to sing. But every time she thought of a note her mind jumped to the water bill of her and Carter's new home, and every time she thought of a lyric it just reminded her of what could have been. They were right, everyone was right. Rachel Berry had ruined her life, and the price she paid was herself.

"This it?" The driver asked in a thick Brooklyn accent. Rachel pulled herself out of her trance to glance out the misted window that was definitely it. She plummeted her hand into her purse and retrieved the cash inside. After a few minutes of counting her coppers she finally got twenty dollars, but looking at the tariff she could see a bold 35 glistening in front of her. She poured the money into the mans hand with an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, this is all I have-" before she could continue she could hear the calling of the speaker above saying her train had arrived. "I'm sorry" she pleaded again before clawing the door open and running down the platform away from the rude remarks of the angry driver and towards her last chance, a chance she wouldn't let go. She could feel the burning pain of her heels rub against her sore feet, the stench of alcohol that remained on her stained clothes, the air of desperation that seemed to flood over her ever since that one night. As her heart drummed and her heels clattered she pounded her way to the train – just in time to watch it depart. Heaving with a lack of breath she buckled forwards and tried to calm herself, but somehow she couldn't, the tears seemed to cascade down her porcelain face just too easily. It was over.

Behind her she hardly even noticed the tapping of delicate feet as a mildly out of breath blonde came by behind her. Her face was warm like honey and her golden hair seemed to bounce in a way with such ease that Rachel envied its natural warmth. She was dressed in a camel colour coat and smart trousers, finished with boots and an emerald green scarf that made the green in her eye spark out. Her makeup was subtle and faint, and everything about her seemed to be like a spell. A spell that was so familiar, so friendly, it was as if Rachel had known her all her life. She felt like she did, she recognized those eyes, and that smile but somehow in her hung over haze she just couldn't quite put a name to the face.

"Oh god, has it left?" the mysterious blonde asked in a voice that Only confirmed what Rachel couldn't see. It was Quinn Fabray. And with those eyes every thought and every feeling, every emotion and every desire came crashing down onto Rachel. The brunette straightened up and with a gulp fiercely brushed away the tears that strained her face. But then Quinn finally looked at her, properly looked at her. Her expression was like a melody, at first there was sympathy in her eyes as there would be in any strangers, and Rachel was glad to see there was no judgment, but there was however something puzzling about it. Curiosity replaced empathy as the blonde looked at Rachel hard, finally her eyes burst like crashing waves with realisation, in exactly the same moment that Rachel caught sight of the diamond ring laced around the girls wedding finger.

"_Rachel?"_


End file.
